Single & Celibate? Why Mr. Right Won’t Wait For Sex

If you are celibate, keep it a secret. There is no need to announce it. It is the last thing that a man wants to hear.

You meet a man you are interested in dating.  Next, in your casual conversation you mention you are celibate. Are you out of your mind?

While your objective is to make sure the man truly likes you and gets to know you before you give up the goodies, be realistic. How long do you think a man is going to hold out without having sex? Most men won’t wait more than 90 days.

Your decision to remain celibate is based on your own, personal, selfish desire to meet the man of your dreams and avoid getting hurt. You want the rewards of a relationship without the collateral damage, and you are using your body — instead of your brain — as a bargaining tool.

Consider this: he may not be sexually attracted to you. However, if he finds you attractive in other ways, he may continue to date you while seeing someone else on the side. So, don’t allow your fear of having sex to hold you — or him — captive. After all, life is short. Live and love. Tomorrow is not promised.

It should not take you more than 90 days to figure whether you want to have sex or not. You may think you are the bomb-dot-com, but reality is reality, so stay within the circle of reason. It’s a very competitive world out there.

Ask the appropriate questions, get to know him and then make a decision. Be very considerate of his time and what you are asking him to do. Remember that what you’re asking is a stretch with an unknown destination date.

Your belief that you are amazing in bed has nothing to do with finding and keeping the man of your dreams. You may temporarily attract a man with your sexual prowess, but it is not the act itself that makes sex great; it’s intellect and love combined with the act, along with a few other things. If there is nothing inside of you, you can make a man wait for a year and still get the same, failed results.

Don’t rush, but do be realistic. It’s a super sexy world out there and you should achieve your goal of finding and keeping a man who is truly interested in you. Just don’t price yourself out of the market.

Need-Help-ad-3x2Does he take you out to dinner, or do you each pay your own way? If you are sexually celibate, you should also be celibate with his pocketbook. When you pay your own way, your objective will be clear and he will not feel used if things don’t work out.

Please understand how a man thinks. His ultimate goal is to gain carnal knowledge of you. You can’t hide your true emotions when you are having sex. It must be the real you because you are calling for God over and over again. Should Women Talk Trash During Sex?

If you ever get confused, ask yourself: would you date a celibate man? Would you want to pick him up, take him out on dates, buy him dinner, spend your hard-earned money and not even get a kiss (much less an orgasm)? So, what are you going to do? After all, as the old saying goes, if you don’t use it, you lose it!

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  1. You say :
    “Your decision to remain celibate is based on your own, personal, selfish desire to meet the man of your dreams and avoid getting hurt. You want the rewards of a relationship without the collateral damage, and you are using your body — instead of your brain — as a bargaining tool.”
    I know single people who pratice celibacy and it’s not about that at all. It is VERY difficult in a world where sex is everything to chose not to participate against all of your basic instincts. People don’t do that for selfish reasons. If they were selfish, they would indulge themselves to the sexual pleasure they crave. The only people I know who purposefully practice celibacy is because they believe that sex is a sacred thing that is reserved for those who are married. They do not want to profane sex by making it common or casual. They will not share it outside of the bonds of matrimoney and are not interested in using it as a tool to capture a man’s affections.
    If someone is looking for a husband who share’s their respect for sex as something to be reserved for marriage, it could save them a lot of time by bringing it up early on in the relationship so there is less drama if the guy isn’t a guy who can respect that.

    • Thank you Slyguy. As someone who is celibate, I could play devil’s advocate and say that someone who is hellbent on sleeping with me in 90 days is selfish (and lacks self-control) as well. I don’t have to compete with the thots of the world…a woman who spreads her legs to every man she meets within 90 days comes a dime a dozen. Just because everyone can’t afford a Maybach or a Bentley doesn’t mean the company will make the price of the car less expensive…you either can get it, or you can’t. Women of substance have more to offer than their vaginas…

  2. Interesting points on celibacy issue. More appropriate might be for a couple to wait for a monogamous relationship unless they both want just a booty call. It is up to the both participants to decide and then have only SAFE SEX using condoms until they have both been tested for STD’s. Incidence of STD’s in all ages is still rising whether you are a teen or or Senior. Better Safe than Sorry or Dead.

  3. I have a somewhat interesting question. I would consider myself a normal, pleasant, confident woman. However I am asexual, meaning I do not experience sexual attraction.
    I do experience romantic attraction, I feel romantic love and I like to kiss and cuddle. Now, my asexuality does not mean sex is off the table, I do realize that most men will find sex necessary in our relationship. What this does mean, is that I will require a great deal of time to become comfortable enough with a man to even think of having sex with him due to the fact that I do not want the sex.
    I have gotten advice from other asexual women stating that it is best to tell a man early on so he knows all of this. However, I would like to get advice from a sexual man on this subject.

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