This is a question you should ask your partner before committing to a relationship. The combination of a high sex drive and low sex drive can cause problems like frustration and hurt feelings. Sure, sex isn’t the only reason men and women date each other, but our over anxious selves often get the best of us and cloud our ability to make decisions. And sexual incompatibility can be a deal breaker. (First Date Deal Breakers)
Kris, 40 plus years on the planet, says, “I have a high sex drive and two times a week is just not enough. I need to have sex at least six days a week minimum, and one day off for rest, and that will be the Lord’s day of rest day. Monday morning, it’s back to business, buddy.” Kris says she had a Vagina Lock-Down last night and slept on the couch in protest of her man not giving her enough: “Either he gets it up, or I will be looking for second man to compensate the difference.” Ladies, what do you think ?
Looking for second man might be a good idea; however, Kris may want to stay tuned in to find out how most men think and feel before she goes out “guy shopping.”
Myeisha, 34 years on the planet: “At least five times a week [but] I work too much to be having sex every day. Plus, you want him to miss it a little bit…. Realistically people get tired of each other, that’s why space is important.”
Jazmin, 25 years on the planet: “Maybe three times a week.” In Jazmin opinion, three is a privileged number due to all the challenges of work and keeping your mind focused.
Chantal, 40 plus years on the planet: “At least three times keeps a happy home, because if you have business and things to do, and are not sitting up all the time, and have kids… then three times is reasonable. But if you do not have any kids, then every day. If the basic minimum of three times is not met, then there is something wrong with the relationship… and if you have no kids it should be on and popping’… or else, in my opinion, there is a major problem with the sexual compatibility.”
Johanna, 28 years on planet: “Every day.” And she had a big smile…
Dee, 40 plus year on the planet, single with no kids: “Sex or some type of intimate connection like back rub, oral sex, massage, with the man should be an every day activity.”
Kim, 34 years on the planet: “Personally, as a woman, every day would be great for me, but from speaking with men, I could live with three times in a week. I believe that every day can drain a person, but if you can spread it out, it will keep the sex hot and make your sex life more interesting. If you have sex every day, people kind of get tired of the repetition. When women get, older say like in their forties, I hear they really get hot in the pants… unless they were freaks when they were younger, then they try to downplay it. I wonder why?”
Katie, 23 years on the planet: First ask the question if we are talking before or after marriage? We told her to assumed the couple is married or in a committed relationship. After clarification, Katie says, ” she only believes in sex after marriage and if we are married than as many times as we like, but on average 3 times a weeks would be great” (When To Have Sex with the Man of You’re Dating).
Gwen, 40 years on the planet, is right behind Kris: “I agree twice a week is not enough! My man should give it to me every day, especially if we switch it up. Can I say freak of the week?” What do you ladies say to that?
Gwen was quite surprised to find out some men’s opinion’s after a local trip to the barber shop. When the question “How many times a week should a man have sex with the woman of his dreams” was presented, the men in the barber shop flipped the question and asked her to answer first! Excitedly she said, “I think my man should give it to me every day! Seven out of seven days!” Well, to make a long story short, one man in the barber shop said, “Wow, you are getting down like that?”, and everybody else pretty much looked at Gwen like she was half cocked crazy. After she found out this harsh reality she kind of just faded out of the conversation and became a listener. Ouch.
Can I interrupt and say, ladies, wishful thinking. Sex every day is far from. Oh, how women fail to understand the nature of a man’s thinking. Yes, most of us love to have sex to a certain degree, especially when it’s fresh and new – it is our nature. However, like any new thing, it eventually gets old and we tired of it, unless you help to keep the sex fresh and exciting. This will require a lot of work on a woman’s part that, quite frankly, many don’t put in, whether they lack the necessary skills or are either ignorant or apathetic. (Oral Sex 101: What You Need to Know) Being single requires less work for women because most are on the receiving end; however, when you enter into a long-term committed relationship, you will eventually discover that there is a great energy shift: the man may become less interested, in which case it is the woman who has to now reinvent herself in order to remain sexually attractive in his eyes. (What is the Secret to Always Remaining Beautiful in a Man’s Eyes) This is the point where most relationships fail because many women never comprehend this shift in energy and thus never compensate for it –perhaps because most have spent their whole lives being pursued by men.
So, you ask, how do you compensate for the shift? First, realize that the shift is coming whether you like it or not, if you are committed to long-term monogamy. Second, keep up your physical appearance by exercising and eating properly. Many women let themselves go and cover up with Spanx like we can’t see that tire around your midsection. Thirdly, keep your mind sharp and don’t get too comfortable in your relationship. Always treat it like it’s a new relationship – something you value and are excited by.
Let’s face it, most men will get tired of even the woman of his dreams if he is having sex with her every day … and although you switch it up, to men, it’s like seeing you wear the same pair of shoes every day for a year: he will eventually say, “Baby, let’s go shopping and get you some new shoes.”
Here is what some of the most experienced of bachelors as well as men in committed relationships had to say:
Diggy, 40+ year on the planet: “Most of my friends who have time to have sex every day are broke! On a good week, I would give her a good three to four times (more often three as opposed to four). But being self-employed, my time or schedule does not permit or allow me to have sex every day. Just too busy building business and paying bills! Plus, I know when it’s hot in the summer time, I want my AC to work.”
As a woman, you might say, “But I have a high sex drive, and I’m not broke!” In their youths, men’s energy and focus often goes to chasing different girls, which isn’t the same as a woman having lots of sex with just one man. Her focus is not all over the place – running to Beverly Hills to pick up one girl, dropping her off to go pick up another in Santa Monica, and then out to the club to meet up with another lady. Do you see the difference? I personally know I wasted a lot of time as a man in my younger days chasing women – women for whom I now have nothing to show but all of this relationship experience. Although I had fun, it was truly a waste of my time business wise, not to mention all of the money spent and wasted at the club on numerous, overpriced drinks!
Now back to our other voices…
Shelton, 40 + years on the planet: Even if it’s the woman of my dreams and she lives with me, I give her a good three times a week.
Mike , 27 years on the planet: “Every day!” But, remember, Mike has no kids and minimal responsibility.
Bishop M, 50 +years on the planet: “For married couples, as much as you want… That’s good customer service. This should be decided pre-marriage and according to God’s word in Genesis 2:24: ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, … his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh…’ Otherwise, if you’re not married, you are creating soul ties with each person you have sex with and taking a little piece of each person you have sex with to the next person and relationship. So that sex should be rare.”
What’s interesting is that most of the women said they wanted to have sex every day, but for a man in a committed relationship, that request becomes a bit unrealistic as the years start rolling by. (How to Resuscitate Your Relationship if You’re only having Sex Once a Year) Ed. Note: It seems to me that media portrayals of men lead women to believe that men want to have sex all the time, will go elsewhere if you’re not having sex every day, etc. I wonder how many women SAY that they want sex every day because they believe that’s what the man wants, but haven’t actually listened to REAL men in their lives? These interviews show women that they can calm down and be more honest about how much sex they need. But experience can always win out over youth if you know how to get inside the mind of a man and getting inside the mind of a man is what will always keep the sex hot.