takecare

How to Take Care of the Man You’re Dating 101

Okay ladies, this is a 100-level course, which means the work load won’t be too bad, and as long as you read the material, it should be an easy A. In this class, we’re going to focus our studies on the methods and ways to take care of your man. Since this is an online course, we will never know if you actually read the material or not. But, there is a test at the end of the course. The test will cover the material presented here.

We will look at three of the most popular theories that address how to take care of your man. Keep in mind that this is not an exhaustive list of theories, but rather the most popular ones that seem to have the highest rates of success.

The first theory is what we call the “Boost Theory”. The name refers to the idea of giving your man a self-esteem ‘boost’ of some kind. If there’s one thing we all know about men, it’s that we need affirmation. The area of affirmation is different for everybody, but the bottom line is, by affirming your man in his specific area, you are taking care of one of his most important needs. But enough about theories, how does this apply to the real world? Here’s an example:

Your man is a very hard worker, and he enjoys his job. He takes pride in knowing that he is an above average employee and often tells you about his successes at the office. The boost you would give your man here is telling him that you know he’s a hard worker, and probably the best employee his company has. An important note to remember: don’t wait until your man is feeling bad about something at work, or has a bad day to give him a boost. Of course that’s a good idea, but it’s equally important to give your man a boost even when he doesn’t appear to need one.

We call the second theory the “Listening Theory”. This is pretty self-explanatory. Men like to be listened to, no matter what nonsense may come out. This is a simple and effective way to take care of your man. The important distinction to make with this theory is the difference between how you listen to your man and how you want your man to listen to you. They are two completely different things. So before attempting this theory, forget about how you like your man to listen to you. Here’s the real life application:
When you think about listening to your man, think of yourself as more of a sound board. Your man will throw words at you, and all you have to do is bounce them back with an occasional nod. The truth is, men don’t usually care if you are interested in what they are talking about. Most of the time, men actually know that you don’t care, but we don’t tell you these things for your sake; we tell you for our sake. If your man loves a certain musician and he knows that you don’t, that won’t stop him from explaining to you that their sound has really changed since their sophomore album, and not for the better. We talk more about the art of listening in the article, “Things You Can Do to Impress Us”.

The last theory is called the “Assurance Theory”. This is the most difficult of the three, just because it takes the most effort on your part. The concept behind the Assurance Theory is that, every so often, you remind your man that you are with him and nobody else – that no other guy could take your attention away from your man. By assuring your man of your dedication to him and your relationship, you are satisfying his most basic need: security. For a man, security is like a drug. When you have it, you never want to get off of it, but when it’s gone, withdraw symptoms come full force. The application example may explain it better:

Your man likes to be in control, at least the majority of the time. But it’s not the controlling part that satisfies him, it’s the security. The security in knowing that there is someone else that is willing to follow his lead. When you assure your man that you are 100% with him and nobody else, you are fulfilling his need of feeling secure.

We want to thank you for enrolling in this online course. Now, we’re sure you’re all wondering about the test we promised. Well, here it is, one question, open ended opinion:

1. How will your man react when you apply the theories above; Boost, Listening and Assurance? (Hint: before answering, try them and find out.)

Stay tuned for How to Take Care of Your Man 299…

 

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