Communicate with us! Communication does not mean to give sailors a run for their money with vulgar language, although that can be fun to hear sometimes. It means guidance. No matter how long or how many times a couple has done the deed, communication is still essential for mutually smoother and genuinely enjoyed sex. Time is a funny and uncontrollable variable that changes body shapes, opinions, libido levels and desire. With these changes come different wanted experiences with sex. Maybe that favorite contortionist position you used to do back in the day isn’t such a good idea anymore. Maybe it was never a good idea!
The different changes in your sexual desire should be voiced. Men love it when you feel free and comfortable enough to advise us on how to hold you, make comments on our pacing and give insight to our positioning. If we are too rough or not rough enough, let us know! Make your needs known. Voicing out these subtle tweaks lead to a healthier sex life and also is the preamble into the favorite phrase every man loves to hear while pleasuring their partner: “Yes, right there!”
We don’t like:
Although communication is great, there is a difference between constructive guidance and just making noise. If your porn star moans are genuine, great! Men love it when women are loud and feel free to express themselves. But no matter how loud the screams, it is sometimes difficult for men to discern a truthful, “YES-YES” from a faked, “YES-YES”. Being loud and overly expressive can be deceiving. It’s alright to be loud and vulgar, but take a second to calm your voice and look into your man’s eyes and tell him exactly how good he is making you feel. Thereafter, he will undoubtedly know that he is genuinely being praised and you are enjoying yourself. If you plan to walk the walk, remember that you need to talk the talk.
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Sexy thong with matching top, garter and thigh-high stockings is quite the ensemble and are all very entertaining and fun. However, women put too much emphasis on dressing up. Wearing something sexy does not automatically mean you have succeeded in enticing us. For men, it’s not entirely what you wear – especially since most of us prefer you to wear absolutely nothing – but how you wear it.
Your emitted confidence is what turns us on. If you feel confident enough to showcase your body and make it clear that all of you belongs to him, he will feel a sexual connection with you like none other. And if you want to really turn up the fire, do a little show for him. A dance, or even a couple minutes of bouncing around your endowments will have your man drooling over you and ready to go 10 innings with you between the sheets!
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Women are growing increasingly uncomfortable with their bodies. Society places a high and nearly impossible rubric on the standard and meaning of beauty. This, unfortunately, causes you to fret when comparing yourself to an actress or a Victoria’s Secret Model. You have to stop this immediately! Men are visual and we do not see what you see. You don’t have to be a Victoria’s Secret Model to seduce us. Hell, you don’t even have to be named Victoria. You are who you are and your man is not with you just because of your looks.
Self-confidence does amazing things for people. If you have to fake it at first, that is fine. When you fake something long enough, you’ll start to believe it – so if you have to fake confidence, fake it, and no one will know but you. You’d be surprised to know that other people usually don’t even notice the things you’re self-conscious about. Learn to love yourself and be confident while wearing your sexy ensemble. Only then can you act cute, playful and let him know that it is his time to be pleasured. Confidence really does speak louder than words and can, in fact, leave us speechless!
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Get behind the wheel and take control from time to time! Sometimes you get too comfortable with allowing your man to do all the work. If you really want to heighten your sexual experience and strengthen your sexual bond, you have to switch it up. Alternate between taking control and allowing him to do the seducing.
Men like it when a woman is on top and is in control, but keep in mind that this is only on occasion. Wanting it your way only will eventually lower his sexual desire for you. As much as we like you to take control of the sexual situation, we also like you to fall prey to it. Men enjoy pleasuring their women just as much as they enjoy being pleasured, but there has to be balance. Without you both alternating fairly, the sexual act will become work and bothersome. If your man has pleasured you the past few sexual occurrences, be bold (even bossy if you have to) and take control of the reins in order to sustain a balanced and enjoyable sex life. One of the joys of being in a relationship is that you don’t need to search for romance, so make the most of it!
We don’t like:
We don’t like anything unexpected! Do not proceed to place, insert, or stick anything, anywhere, without the green light from your man. Just because your best friend’s husband likes it, doesn’t mean that all men, including your man, will enjoy the same act. He’ll wonder who the heck you’ve been talking to, making things awkward not only with the moment but with the friend who gave you the idea. This is a popular trap that women fall into when attempting to take control in sexual situations. As an attempt to spice things up and make the best of you pleasuring your loved one, you will try new things that maybe your girlfriend mentioned to you or that you heard on Oprah. Before you accept sexual advice, confirm with your man that he is willing to try something new. It is important to understand how adventurous and willing your man is to exploring new sexual habits well before the clothes hit the floor. Otherwise, his clothes will come back on just as quickly as they were snatched off!